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Fathers It's Your Responsibility to Meet the Intimacy Needs of your Children

6/17/2022

Although this is difficult for me, I must be honest. When my children were young I was a horrible dad because I wasn’t there for them. Their mother and I divorced when the three of them were still young. Then I moved away and didn’t see them for many years. I regret not being there for them or with them and although I have tried and am trying to do better now that they are all adults, I realize that I will never be able to fix the damage done in the past. I will never be able to recover all that they and I lost because I wasn’t there. I just ask that they forgive me as God has forgiven me.

I have watched them over the last several years and thank God for their mother. They are much better parents than I was. Having said all that, I do know that it is not too late to develop, foster and improve the relationship that I have with my children.
I needed to get that out before giving fathers and mothers, and those who have assumed the role of parents, some things that the Holy Spirit has shown me in the last few years.

The Holy Spirit has shown me that although many people don’t think that they really have many needs…they do. It is the responsibility of parents, and since it’s close to Father’s Day, let's be more specific it’s the responsibility of fathers to meet the needs of their children…no matter their age. This post lists ten intimate needs that are there no matter the age and it’s up to us fathers to meet them. Meeting our children's needs is the physical, emotional, and spiritual practice of love. When meeting the needs of our children, we look most like Jesus.

The Top Ten Intimacy Needs

1. Acceptance: Can you receive me and unconditionally love me even if I never change?

2. Affection: We are talking about touches and cuddles and verbalized expressions of love.

3. Appreciation: This has to do with someone commending the things you do.

4. Attention: Who is spending time with you?

5. Approval: This is close to appreciation but also contains an affirmation of who you are.

6. Comfort: Who will let you cry? Who will cry with you? If you only have one temperature, you don’t have enough.

7. Encouragement: This is to urge others to fulfill their dreams, goals, and desires. Who’s your cheerleader?

8. Respect: The key word here is value. I need someone to value my opinions, ideas, thoughts, and convictions.

9. Security: This is not just freedom from physical harm and having the doors locked. It has to do with emotional protection.

10. Support: This is a practical need. "I don’t need you to criticize me or advise me, I need you to get under this burden and share the load with me.”

Pay attention to your children’s needs and deliberately meet them daily. You’ll be a great father, a great parent.

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To be Filled with The Holy Spirit is to be Controled by the Holy Spirit

6/9/2022

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Many Christians believe that being baptized by and being filled by the Holy Spirit are the same thing. They’re not.

Who is the Holy Spirit? The Holy Spirit is God. He is a member of the Trinity and has a will and a distinct personality. The Holy Spirit also has a purpose and specific work that He wants to do in our lives.
Before we became Christians, the Holy Spirit convicts us of our sin and draws us to Christ. And once we believed in Christ, the Holy Spirit sealed us. Now the Holy Spirit leads us, empowers us, and fills us each day.

Baptism By The Holy Spirit

At the moment of conversion and salvation the believer in Jesus Christ is said to be baptized into the body of Christ by the Holy Spirit. The baptism and the indwelling of the Holy Spirit are related and happen at the same time.

Romans 10:9-10 (NKJV)9 that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.10 For with the heart one believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.

The baptism of the Holy Spirit is the event where Jesus becomes our Lord and we are joined with other believers in the body of Christ.

1 Corinthians 12:13 (NKJV)13 For by one Spirit we were all baptized into one body--whether Jews or Greeks, whether slaves or free--and have all been made to drink into one Spirit.

Galatians 3:27 (NKJV)27 For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ.

When you received the baptism of the Holy Spirit at salvation you were indwelt (permanently present in your soul or spirit) by the Spirit.

1 Corinthians 3:16 (NLT)16 Don’t you realize that all of you together are the temple of God and that the Spirit of God lives in you?

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 (NLT)19 Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself,20 for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.

2 Timothy 1:14 (NLT)14 Through the power of the Holy Spirit who lives within us, carefully guard the precious truth that has been entrusted to you.

When you are indwelt you are also sealed.

Ephesians 1:13-14 (NKJV)13 In Him you also trusted, after you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation; in whom also, having believed, you were sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise,14 who is the guarantee of our inheritance until the redemption of the purchased possession, to the praise of His glory.

Filled By The Holy Spirit

While the baptism and indwelling of the Holy Spirit happen only once at conversion, the filling of the Spirit can happen multiple times after conversion. The idea of being filled by the Spirit is more about an ongoing sense of God's Spirit working in a person's life, not a one-time experience.

There is never any commandment in the Bible for one of us to be baptized by the Spirit, or to be sealed by the Spirit, or to be indwelt by the Spirit, or to be anointed by the Spirit, but there is an imperative command and mandate that we be filled by the Spirit.

Ephesians 5:15-20 (NLT)15 So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise.16 Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days.17 Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do.18 Don’t be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, be filled with the Holy Spirit,19 singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs among yourselves, and making music to the Lord in your hearts.20 And give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

To be filled is to be controlled completely by the Holy Spirit.

The Holy Spirit’s filling has nothing to do with our emotions. People often confuse the gifts and work of the Holy Spirit with being filled with or by Him.

I Corinthians 12:4‭-‬11 NKJV There are diversities of gifts, but the same Spirit. There are differences of ministries, but the same Lord. And there are diversities of activities, but it is the same God who works all in all. But the manifestation of the Spirit is given to each one for the profit of all: for to one is given the word of wisdom through the Spirit, to another the word of knowledge through the same Spirit, to another faith by the same Spirit, to another gifts of healings by the same Spirit, to another the working of miracles, to another prophecy, to another discerning of spirits, to another different kinds of tongues, to another the interpretation of tongues. But one and the same Spirit works all these things, distributing to each one individually as He wills.

When we’re filled with the Holy Spirit, it simply means the Spirit controls us. When we ask God to fill us with His Spirit, we are asking Him to control our lives. The word the apostle Paul used in Ephesians 5:18 to describe the filling of the Holy Spirit also means “to permeate”, or spread throughout, penetrate, percolate through, extend throughout.

Ephesians 5:18 NKJV And do not be drunk with wine, in which is dissipation; but be filled with the Spirit, (emphasis mine).

In other words, the Holy Spirit wants to be part of every aspect of our lives. He wants to permeate our careers and our ministries. He wants to be a part of everything.
So let the Holy Spirit permeate every area of your life. Let the Holy Spirit fill you and control you. It isn’t about trying harder; it’s about realizing there is power available to help us live the Christian life.

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This Christian's View on Gun Control

6/8/2022

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I have tried to stay out of the public debate on guns and gun violence in the United States but the of mass murders and continuing incidences of gun violence that have occurred and continue to happen in the US daily have forced me to speak up and speak out. I can’t keep silent anymore.

We Christians all know that because of sin violence enters the human story early.

Genesis 4:8 NIV Now Cain said to his brother Abel, “Let’s go out to the field.” While they were in the field, Cain attacked his brother Abel and killed him.

From that first instance time violence soon becomes endemic.

Genesis 6:12 NIV God saw how corrupt the earth had become, for all the people on earth had corrupted their ways.

God hates violence. We see that especially in the prophets.

Ezekiel 8:17 NCV He said to me, “Do you see, human? Is it unimportant that the people of Judah are doing the hateful things they have done here? They have filled the land with violence and made me continually angry. Look, they are insulting me every way they can.

Hosea 12:1 NCV What Israel does is as useless as chasing the wind; he chases the east wind all day. They tell more and more lies and do more and more violence. They make agreements with Assyria, and they send a gift of olive oil to Egypt.

The Bible says that the result of violence will be for divine destruction of the people who practice and favor it

Obadiah 1:10 NCV You did violence to your relatives, the Israelites, so you will be covered with shame and destroyed forever.

Recent mass murders using automatic weapons, like the ones in Buffalo, Tulsa, Uvalde, and at churches in Ames, IA, and Laguna Woods, CA, never mind the mass murders by guns since Columbine, force us to pay attention again to violence here in the United States. They also prompt our endless debates about guns.

I believe that fewer guns in fewer hands will lead to fewer gun deaths. There is some evidence to suggest this does in fact happen.

Over one hundred people are shot and killed every day in this country. Twenty-five times as many people are murdered with firearms than in other rich countries, and twenty-eight times as many women. Guns increase the total number of homicides: last year, there were as many murders in Philadelphia as in England, despite the population of England being thirty times the size. These deaths are disproportionately clustered amongst poor communities and African Americans, with black Americans ten times more likely to be shot dead than white Americans. One million American women have been shot at by a domestic partner. Firearms are the leading cause of death for American children. And so on.

The question is whether anything can or should be done about the proliferation of guns, especially automatic weapons, and if so, what.

Australia faced that question in 1996. After thirty-five people were killed in a mass shooting in Tasmania, the government took robust action, banning all semi-automatic and automatic weapons, imposing longer and stricter waiting periods and more rigorous licensing and storage restrictions, and requiring a “genuine reason” to own a gun (which included hunting and target shooting, but did not include self-defense). Since then, the government has bought back one million semi-automatic weapons, halving the total number of gun-owning households in the country. The number of gun homicides has dramatically reduced in that time, and the overall homicide rate has halved.

Of course, there are political and legal obstacles to reform in the US which do not exist in Australia. But pro-life Christians in this country have a track record of advocacy for what they believe is right in the face of congressional and/or juridicial intransigence. If we pro- life Christians were as enthusiastic about the death of men, women, and children as we are about the abortion of an unborn child we would fight for sensible gun control with the same fervor. Congressional and/or juridical intransigence would not stop us from demanding change. Just look back at the more the 50 year battle put up by pro-life Christians after the Roe vs. Wade Supreme Court decision.

Three points I want to make here.

1) Gun violence is a large and tragic problem which afflicts America far more than comparable nations, and disadvantaged Americans more than anybody else. This is a grievous injustice.

2) International examples suggest that this injustice could be reduced if tighter gun restrictions were applied. Regression analysis comparing US states has shown that greater restrictions are strongly correlated with lower gun deaths, (regression analysis is a reliable method of identifying which variables have impact on a topic of interest. a regression allows you to confidently determine which factors matter most, which factors can be ignored, and how these factors influence each other) although unsurprisingly there is plenty of debate about the whys and wherefores of that.

3) The benefits of tighter gun controls, both for potential victims and the communities in which they live (and die), outweigh the limitations on personal freedom that they involve.

Owning guns is legitimate, and guns have reasonable recreational uses, including sport shooting and hunting. I will acknowledge that citizens have the right to bear some “arms,” but that the right to bear other “arms” should be infringed.

This is the Second Amendment to the US Constitution.

"A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed."

There is a wide spectrum of arms, with carving knives at one end and weapons of mass destruction at the other. Somewhere in the middle are automatic weapons like AK-15 style rifles. There is also a wide spectrum of control. On one end, we might issue a warning on the packaging, refuse to sell them to children, or restrict their carriage in public spaces. At the heavy end, we would arrest anyone found making or owning one on suspicion of domestic terrorism.

We regulate other potentially dangerous things of everyday life—like driving, drinking alcohol, and drugs (prescription and illegal). To make society safer, we regulate these and similar activities.

The "the right of the people to keep and bear Arms" is not absolute. This "right" is balanced with the “right” of other people to eat in a restaurant or have a night out, go or play baseball—or the “right” not to be blown to smithereens while shopping, or in school, or at a party or attending church or while walking down the street.

The benefits of using carving knives are greater than the risks of being stabbed by them, on the other hand the personal freedom to own an automatic weapon is dramatically outweighed by the chance of killing and maiming innocent people. Sensible regulation should be a function of lethality (how many people it could kill), purpose (what it was designed for), and utility (what it is typically used for).

Counter to arguments from the National Rifle Association, regulating rights does not restrict freedom but makes it possible. We Christians, for example, champion the right to practice religion freely while gladly submitting to building and zoning codes, noise laws, and many other “restrictions” for the sake of community harmony.

I don’t condemn anyone for owning a gun, but I want people to realize the power of the violence they hold in their hand when they have a gun. And that just because you have a right to own a gun does not mean you have to exercise the right to use it.”

So, while I support the legitimacy of owning guns, given the violence of our land and God’s hatred of violence, I believe that we should also see a need to regulate the purchase and use of guns. We Christians should work to ban weapons whose main purpose is to kill a lot of people very quickly, to keep guns in general out of the hands of unstable personalities, and to ensure that everyone who buys and owns guns can demonstrate they know how to use and store them safely.

Will this alone eliminate American violence? Hardly. The problem runs too deeply in our veins as descendants of Cain. Other contributors (like the glorification of guns and violence in TV and movies, to name just one) must also be addressed. Nonetheless, increased gun control is one small step that could become the first of many that together forestall our divine destruction.

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Fathers It's Your Responsibility to Meet the Intimacy Needs of your Children

To be Filled with The Holy Spirit is to be Controled by the Holy Spirit

This Christian's View on Gun Control

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