Have you ever questioned God and His timing, perhaps asking, "Where were you when I really needed you?" I've certainly been there. "Where were you, God," I asked, when my wife, Ruth, lost her children—one at 6 months, another at 16, and yet another at 41? "Where were you, God," when the company I relocated from Atlanta to Orlando to join closed its doors less than one month after I moved? "Where were you, God," during those two periods of three months when I was unemployed with no unemployment benefits? "Where were you, God," when my wife of 40 years breathed her last breath? Where were you God when my granddaughter fought and lost her battle with cancer? And perhaps you're asking, "Where were you, God," when (you fill in the blank)?
I know we've been taught all our lives, by well-meaning people, that He was always there, that He promised to never leave or forsake us.
Deuteronomy 31:6 NIV Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”
Joshua 1:5 NIV No one will be able to stand against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.
Isaiah 41:10 NIV So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
And that He promised to give us "peace that passes all understanding."
Philippians 4:6-7 NIV [6] Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. [7] And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
We've probably even said those things to others when trying to provide comfort during a tragic and trying time. But because I've asked those questions myself, I stopped using those phrases when anyone asked me where God was during a tragedy.
He Wasn't Late After All
When God doesn’t show up as expected, it does more than disappoint. It can knock your faith off the rails.
"Lord, if You had been here…" Mary and Martha felt this way about Jesus when their brother Lazarus got sick and died. Jesus, their friend, was not far away, and they had sent an urgent message for Him to come right away.
John 11:1-7 NIV [1] Now a man named Lazarus was sick. He was from Bethany, the village of Mary and her sister Martha. [2] (This Mary, whose brother Lazarus now lay sick, was the same one who poured perfume on the Lord and wiped his feet with her hair.) [3] So the sisters sent word to Jesus, “Lord, the one you love is sick.” [4] When he heard this, Jesus said, “This sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God’s glory so that God’s Son may be glorified through it.” [5] Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. [6] So when he heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days, [7] and then he said to his disciples, “Let us go back to Judea.” (emphasis mine)
Mary and Martha waited. And waited. And Lazarus died. Then Jesus showed up. He offered no excuse.
John 11:14 NIV So then he told them plainly, “Lazarus is dead,
Why hadn’t He come? Didn’t He love them? They thought He did. Everyone referred to Lazarus as "the one Jesus loved". Did He not care after all?
Haven’t you felt this way? These are the questions that almost every Christ-follower asks as they pass through a dark valley: Where are You, God? Why haven’t You come? If You had been here... I wouldn’t have failed. My wife and my granddaughter, wouldn’t have died, I wouldn't have lost my job, I wouldn’t have gotten so hurt.
Jesus’s tardiness in coming to Lazarus was not due to a lack of care. As Jesus would explain, God had orchestrated this situation for a greater purpose — to reveal His glory through His control and ultimate victory over all things.
John 11:15 NIV [15] and for your sake I am glad I was not there, so that you may believe. But let us go to him.” (emphasis mine)
Ok here’s the punchline: Jesus raises Lazarus from the dead.
John 11:41-44 NIV [41] So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me. [42] I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me.” [43] When he had said this, Jesus called in a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” [44] The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face. Jesus said to them, “Take off the grave clothes and let him go.”
Jesus was doing four things in Mary’s and Martha’s pain, and they are what He’s doing in your pain as well.
I know we've been taught all our lives, by well-meaning people, that He was always there, that He promised to never leave or forsake us.
Deuteronomy 31:6 NIV Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”
Joshua 1:5 NIV No one will be able to stand against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.
Isaiah 41:10 NIV So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
And that He promised to give us "peace that passes all understanding."
Philippians 4:6-7 NIV [6] Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. [7] And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
We've probably even said those things to others when trying to provide comfort during a tragic and trying time. But because I've asked those questions myself, I stopped using those phrases when anyone asked me where God was during a tragedy.
He Wasn't Late After All
When God doesn’t show up as expected, it does more than disappoint. It can knock your faith off the rails.
"Lord, if You had been here…" Mary and Martha felt this way about Jesus when their brother Lazarus got sick and died. Jesus, their friend, was not far away, and they had sent an urgent message for Him to come right away.
John 11:1-7 NIV [1] Now a man named Lazarus was sick. He was from Bethany, the village of Mary and her sister Martha. [2] (This Mary, whose brother Lazarus now lay sick, was the same one who poured perfume on the Lord and wiped his feet with her hair.) [3] So the sisters sent word to Jesus, “Lord, the one you love is sick.” [4] When he heard this, Jesus said, “This sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God’s glory so that God’s Son may be glorified through it.” [5] Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. [6] So when he heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days, [7] and then he said to his disciples, “Let us go back to Judea.” (emphasis mine)
Mary and Martha waited. And waited. And Lazarus died. Then Jesus showed up. He offered no excuse.
John 11:14 NIV So then he told them plainly, “Lazarus is dead,
Why hadn’t He come? Didn’t He love them? They thought He did. Everyone referred to Lazarus as "the one Jesus loved". Did He not care after all?
Haven’t you felt this way? These are the questions that almost every Christ-follower asks as they pass through a dark valley: Where are You, God? Why haven’t You come? If You had been here... I wouldn’t have failed. My wife and my granddaughter, wouldn’t have died, I wouldn't have lost my job, I wouldn’t have gotten so hurt.
Jesus’s tardiness in coming to Lazarus was not due to a lack of care. As Jesus would explain, God had orchestrated this situation for a greater purpose — to reveal His glory through His control and ultimate victory over all things.
John 11:15 NIV [15] and for your sake I am glad I was not there, so that you may believe. But let us go to him.” (emphasis mine)
Ok here’s the punchline: Jesus raises Lazarus from the dead.
John 11:41-44 NIV [41] So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me. [42] I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me.” [43] When he had said this, Jesus called in a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” [44] The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face. Jesus said to them, “Take off the grave clothes and let him go.”
Jesus was doing four things in Mary’s and Martha’s pain, and they are what He’s doing in your pain as well.
He’s Weeping
When Jesus hears firsthand from Mary that Lazarus had died, He weeps.
John 11:33-35 NIV [33] When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. [34] “Where have you laid him?” he asked. “Come and see, Lord,” they replied. [35] Jesus wept.
Jesus’ tears seem to be little strange. Didn’t He know He was about to raise Lazarus from the dead? If you know that in less than ten minutes a loved one will be alive, why cry? Instead, why not say to Mary and Martha, "No, no! You don’t need to cry! I’m about to fix everything!"
So why would Jesus weep knowing that in just a few minutes He was about to fix everything? It makes no sense. However, when you see what it’s like to see someone you really love go through pain, even when you know the pain is temporary, when your heart is closely knit together with someone else’s, their pain causes you pain.
It’s true that one day God will wipe away every tear. To God, that moment may seem like it is only seconds away, but we are in pain now, and He feels it. He has united His heart with ours. So, when our heart is broken, His is too. When we weep, He weeps.
Psalms 34:18 NIV The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
I know that Jesus will one day raise the dead, and I know He will take the worst situations and use them for His glory and my good, but when I’m hurting, the most comforting truth of all is knowing that Jesus weeps with me. He’s not late because He doesn’t care. He’s late because He’s up to something greater.
He’s Saving
When Jesus first heard about Lazarus’s sickness, He emphatically declared that this bout of death would not have the final word.
John 11:4 NIV When he heard this, Jesus said, “This sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God’s glory so that God’s Son may be glorified through it.”
But Lazarus did die! Jesus was looking past Lazarus’s death to his resurrection. This sickness did not lead to death; it led through death to a resurrection. Death was just a brief stop along the way. When Martha, Lazarus’s other sister, told Jesus about her brother’s death, Jesus responded by saying;
John 11:23 NIV Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.”
To be honest, Jesus’s words here seem a little bit insensitive. How would you feel if your pastor came and the first thing that he said to the weeping family after someone died was, “your loved one will rise again”? Imagine the funeral when a wife tragically lost her husband. You wouldn’t slap her on the back and say, "What are you crying for? Haven’t you read about the rapture, sister? Have some faith."
Jesus wasn’t just offering her a theology lesson about the future. He was attempting to change her perspective on the present. Martha didn’t see that at first, so she responded with a good religious answer, saying.
John 11:24 NIV Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.”
But Jesus said, "I am the resurrection and the life right now." In other words, "I’m already turning the power of death around, using its powers of destruction to glorify My name and heal you. In Me, even when you die, you don’t really die."
To her credit, Martha said that she believes but I suspect that many people in the church today don’t. What scares us about death is that it feels like permanent loss. Someone we loved is gone forever. But Jesus took all these permanent, bitter parts of death into Himself so that none of it remains for us. Jesus took the sting of death into His hands so that in Him we have nothing more to fear. Death, the mighty enemy, has been reduced to a temporary, inconvenient nuisance.
1 Corinthians 15:55-57 NIV [55] “Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?” [56] The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. [57] But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
He’s Glorifying
Jesus told His disciples that the biggest objective He was pursuing in this encounter was God’s glory. Through every episode of our pain, God is writing a story for His glory. Like Mary and Martha, we sometimes can’t see where that story is going, how our pain fits into it, or why Jesus seems to arrive too late to help us. But because of stories like this one, we can rest assured that He is always working.
One day we will see that everything that happened in our lives was part of the plan that God designed for us for His glory. Through suffering, we come to know Him better.
Romans 5:3-5 NIV [3] Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; [4] perseverance, character; and character, hope. [5] And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.
He breaks up our confidence in ourselves.
Proverbs 3:5-6 NIV[5] Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; [6] in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
We develop compassion for others.
Colossians 3:12-14 NIV [12] Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. [13] Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. [14] And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
We understand how much better God is than all earthly gifts.
James 1:16-17 NIV [16] Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers and sisters. [17] Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.
Where was God when________________? He was right there with you. He was experiencing your pain with you, offering comfort, and working in ways you may not have fully understood at the time, to draw you closer to Him and ultimately for your good, even through the hardest moments.
When Jesus hears firsthand from Mary that Lazarus had died, He weeps.
John 11:33-35 NIV [33] When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. [34] “Where have you laid him?” he asked. “Come and see, Lord,” they replied. [35] Jesus wept.
Jesus’ tears seem to be little strange. Didn’t He know He was about to raise Lazarus from the dead? If you know that in less than ten minutes a loved one will be alive, why cry? Instead, why not say to Mary and Martha, "No, no! You don’t need to cry! I’m about to fix everything!"
So why would Jesus weep knowing that in just a few minutes He was about to fix everything? It makes no sense. However, when you see what it’s like to see someone you really love go through pain, even when you know the pain is temporary, when your heart is closely knit together with someone else’s, their pain causes you pain.
It’s true that one day God will wipe away every tear. To God, that moment may seem like it is only seconds away, but we are in pain now, and He feels it. He has united His heart with ours. So, when our heart is broken, His is too. When we weep, He weeps.
Psalms 34:18 NIV The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
I know that Jesus will one day raise the dead, and I know He will take the worst situations and use them for His glory and my good, but when I’m hurting, the most comforting truth of all is knowing that Jesus weeps with me. He’s not late because He doesn’t care. He’s late because He’s up to something greater.
He’s Saving
When Jesus first heard about Lazarus’s sickness, He emphatically declared that this bout of death would not have the final word.
John 11:4 NIV When he heard this, Jesus said, “This sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God’s glory so that God’s Son may be glorified through it.”
But Lazarus did die! Jesus was looking past Lazarus’s death to his resurrection. This sickness did not lead to death; it led through death to a resurrection. Death was just a brief stop along the way. When Martha, Lazarus’s other sister, told Jesus about her brother’s death, Jesus responded by saying;
John 11:23 NIV Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.”
To be honest, Jesus’s words here seem a little bit insensitive. How would you feel if your pastor came and the first thing that he said to the weeping family after someone died was, “your loved one will rise again”? Imagine the funeral when a wife tragically lost her husband. You wouldn’t slap her on the back and say, "What are you crying for? Haven’t you read about the rapture, sister? Have some faith."
Jesus wasn’t just offering her a theology lesson about the future. He was attempting to change her perspective on the present. Martha didn’t see that at first, so she responded with a good religious answer, saying.
John 11:24 NIV Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.”
But Jesus said, "I am the resurrection and the life right now." In other words, "I’m already turning the power of death around, using its powers of destruction to glorify My name and heal you. In Me, even when you die, you don’t really die."
To her credit, Martha said that she believes but I suspect that many people in the church today don’t. What scares us about death is that it feels like permanent loss. Someone we loved is gone forever. But Jesus took all these permanent, bitter parts of death into Himself so that none of it remains for us. Jesus took the sting of death into His hands so that in Him we have nothing more to fear. Death, the mighty enemy, has been reduced to a temporary, inconvenient nuisance.
1 Corinthians 15:55-57 NIV [55] “Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?” [56] The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. [57] But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
He’s Glorifying
Jesus told His disciples that the biggest objective He was pursuing in this encounter was God’s glory. Through every episode of our pain, God is writing a story for His glory. Like Mary and Martha, we sometimes can’t see where that story is going, how our pain fits into it, or why Jesus seems to arrive too late to help us. But because of stories like this one, we can rest assured that He is always working.
One day we will see that everything that happened in our lives was part of the plan that God designed for us for His glory. Through suffering, we come to know Him better.
Romans 5:3-5 NIV [3] Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; [4] perseverance, character; and character, hope. [5] And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.
He breaks up our confidence in ourselves.
Proverbs 3:5-6 NIV[5] Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; [6] in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
We develop compassion for others.
Colossians 3:12-14 NIV [12] Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. [13] Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. [14] And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
We understand how much better God is than all earthly gifts.
James 1:16-17 NIV [16] Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers and sisters. [17] Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.
Where was God when________________? He was right there with you. He was experiencing your pain with you, offering comfort, and working in ways you may not have fully understood at the time, to draw you closer to Him and ultimately for your good, even through the hardest moments.
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