That knot in your stomach, the constant replay of the past hurts – we all know that feeling. It's as if holding onto resentment gives us some kind of power, a way to make things right. But what if that very act is trapping us, preventing us from moving forward into the peace God desires for us?
Think about it. When we harbor unforgiveness, we're essentially saying our understanding of justice is superior to God's. We're stepping into a role that isn't ours. Who possesses the ultimate power and wisdom to enact true justice? Is it our limited perspective, clouded by emotion, or the boundless understanding of the Almighty? The answer is clear.
Romans 12:17-21 NLT [17] Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. [18] Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone. [19] Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the Lord. [20] Instead, “If your enemies are hungry, feed them. If they are thirsty, give them something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals of shame on their heads.” [21] Don’t let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good. (emphasis mine)
Choosing to forgive is choosing to release that burden to the One who can truly carry it. It's an act of humility, acknowledging that God's ways are higher than our ways.
Isaiah 55:8-9 NLT [8] “My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. [9] For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.
A crucial point is that forgiveness isn't the same as instantly restoring trust. Forgiveness is an immediate act of grace, a decision we make in our hearts. The act of forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves, freeing us from the chains of bitterness.
Ephesians 4:31-32 NLT[31] Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. [32] Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
Trust, on the other hand, is built over time through consistent behavior and demonstrated reliability. You earn trust, you don't earn forgiveness. Confusing the two can create unnecessary roadblocks in the healing process. Someone who has caused deep hurt might ask for forgiveness, and we can and should offer it freely. However, rebuilding trust requires a different journey, one marked by changed actions and a commitment to healing.
Think of a relationship strained by broken promises. Forgiveness can be offered, but the relationship won't automatically revert to its previous state. Moving forward requires honesty, accountability, and a conscious effort to establish a new foundation of trust.
Forgiveness is our part to play, regardless of the other person's actions or response. Jesus taught;
Matthew 5:43-44 NLT [43] “You have heard the law that says, ‘Love your neighbor’ and hate your enemy. [44] But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you!
This doesn't condone their behavior, but it does mean releasing them – and yourself – from the grip of resentment. We forgive for our own spiritual and emotional well-being.
Restoration, however, involves repentance, restitution where possible, and a genuine commitment to change. It's a two-way street that requires time, effort, and the grace of God.
The fear that forgiving means returning to the same cycle of pain often prevents us from letting go. But remember, forgiveness doesn't erase the past or dictate the future of the relationship. It frees you from being held captive by it. You can forgive and still establish healthy boundaries and make different choices about the relationship moving forward.
We choose to forgive, knowing that we are obeying God's command and freeing ourselves. And we place our trust in God's perfect justice, His ability to bring about heart change, and His timing for any potential restoration. Let go and let God work.
Psalms 37:5 NLT Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust him, and he will help you.
Think about it. When we harbor unforgiveness, we're essentially saying our understanding of justice is superior to God's. We're stepping into a role that isn't ours. Who possesses the ultimate power and wisdom to enact true justice? Is it our limited perspective, clouded by emotion, or the boundless understanding of the Almighty? The answer is clear.
Romans 12:17-21 NLT [17] Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. [18] Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone. [19] Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the Lord. [20] Instead, “If your enemies are hungry, feed them. If they are thirsty, give them something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals of shame on their heads.” [21] Don’t let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good. (emphasis mine)
Choosing to forgive is choosing to release that burden to the One who can truly carry it. It's an act of humility, acknowledging that God's ways are higher than our ways.
Isaiah 55:8-9 NLT [8] “My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. [9] For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.
A crucial point is that forgiveness isn't the same as instantly restoring trust. Forgiveness is an immediate act of grace, a decision we make in our hearts. The act of forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves, freeing us from the chains of bitterness.
Ephesians 4:31-32 NLT[31] Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. [32] Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
Trust, on the other hand, is built over time through consistent behavior and demonstrated reliability. You earn trust, you don't earn forgiveness. Confusing the two can create unnecessary roadblocks in the healing process. Someone who has caused deep hurt might ask for forgiveness, and we can and should offer it freely. However, rebuilding trust requires a different journey, one marked by changed actions and a commitment to healing.
Think of a relationship strained by broken promises. Forgiveness can be offered, but the relationship won't automatically revert to its previous state. Moving forward requires honesty, accountability, and a conscious effort to establish a new foundation of trust.
Forgiveness is our part to play, regardless of the other person's actions or response. Jesus taught;
Matthew 5:43-44 NLT [43] “You have heard the law that says, ‘Love your neighbor’ and hate your enemy. [44] But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you!
This doesn't condone their behavior, but it does mean releasing them – and yourself – from the grip of resentment. We forgive for our own spiritual and emotional well-being.
Restoration, however, involves repentance, restitution where possible, and a genuine commitment to change. It's a two-way street that requires time, effort, and the grace of God.
The fear that forgiving means returning to the same cycle of pain often prevents us from letting go. But remember, forgiveness doesn't erase the past or dictate the future of the relationship. It frees you from being held captive by it. You can forgive and still establish healthy boundaries and make different choices about the relationship moving forward.
We choose to forgive, knowing that we are obeying God's command and freeing ourselves. And we place our trust in God's perfect justice, His ability to bring about heart change, and His timing for any potential restoration. Let go and let God work.
Psalms 37:5 NLT Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust him, and he will help you.
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